Adaptation in your country

Finally, after long waiting your darling arrived and now she will need to adapt to new environment. It might be more difficult than you think. Remember the time when you visited her in Russia – how would you feel if you were to stay there for good? This is the way she would feel during the first weeks after arrival.

Luckily there is a lot you can do, to help her to get used to her new home. Here are 12 suggestions:

1. Spend as much time with her as possible, don’t work overtime. She will feel lonely and every minute spending with you is priceless

2. Show her around. Make sure she knows where the nearest shops are. Later, encourage her to learn how to use public transport, so she doesn’t feel restricted at home

3. Make sure that she always has some spending money. She is totally dependant on you, and there is nothing worth than asking a man for every little thing she needs. Women have many expenses men are unaware of, so don’t make her feel deprived. The best thing to do would be to open a joined account and put certain sum there every month, so she can use a visa card from this account. Joint account will also help as proof that your relationship is genuine.

4. Encourage her to study English. If she studied while waiting for her fiancée visa, her English must be good, but probably still not fluent. And the better you can communicate – the better chance your relationship has. Also studying English 3-4 hours a day will occupy her time and help against boredom. If possible, enroll your lady in ESL (English as a second language) classes.

5. Encourage her to find something to keep her busy – gardening, home renovating or reading. It doesn’t matter what she does, as far as she has something to do. If she is busy she will have less time to be home sick.

6. If you live in a big city there should be a Russia shop, possibly more than one. Locate them, so your girl could get Russian books, videos and food

7. Slowly introduce her to your family, starting with people who are open minded and are not hostile toward her. Don’t be surprised if your family don’t approve of your decision to marry a Russian woman. They are probably a victim of media, which portrays Russian brides as mercenary and dishonest. After some time they will realize that your wife isn’t like that, and might even grow to like her. But until that, don’t expose her to people who don’t approve of your relationship.

8. Try to find her Russian girlfriends. Best friends for her would be other Russian women who are married to men in your country. Russians who immigrated by other means might not be open to friendship, they sometimes think that women who immigrate by marriage get it too easy.

9. Install Cyrillic support on your computer, so your lady could write home in Russian

10. If she needs to make a phone call in English, do it for her. Talking on the phone is extremely difficult from the language point of view, because she can’t see facial expressions of the person speaking. Using the phone will make her very nervous, so it is best if you handle all phone calls for a few months.

11. Get her a kitten or a puppy. Don’t laugh, I am serious. Her main problem will be feeling lonely and pets are excellent company. And the best thing about them – she doesn’t have to speak English to them.

12. If she has a child organize school for her kid and make sure you treat him or her well

How soon can a lady adapt to life in my country?

This is very different from person to person. Younger women and girls with outgoing personalities adapt much faster and easier than older ladies and people who are shy. Her language level is also a factor.

If she studies English every day, she will get functional English in 3-4 month. And after 6-9 month it will be fluent. Of course, language skills don’t develop by themselves, I know some people who lived in Australia for 30 years and still can’t read a newspaper, because they simply didn’t bother to study. But most Russian women are highly educated and determent to master English, so she will speak well soon.

She will never become fully American, of course. But after about a year, most Russia women start feeling comfortable in their new country.

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